The next guest wrestlers with a difficult subject. Given that there are stresses all the time in most American homes—how do we maintain in our own households. Her approach is an honest, refreshing look. She is a mother of three stepping stone girls—a modern “All of a kind Family.” She is also a physicist and a math tutor. And while she may think that peace is hard to achieve at home, she is the one who bakes challah almost every week (sometimes chocolate chip!), arranges play dates, serves on synagogue boards, and quietly uses her resources to take in people who need a home.

I hardly know what I think of when I think of peace. Except I know that it is lacking. In my heart, in my home, in my community, in the world.

Shalom Bayit. Peace of the home. I want it so badly, but we just can’t seem to achieve it for long. And when we get peace, it often seems more like detente than an ending of hostilities for the moment, ignoring the others instead of actually engaging. A lot of the trouble is lack of resources. Not enough time to do all that we want, not quite enough money, not enough attention to go around. Not enough sleep. Or maybe we have the raw resources but they just aren’t used wisely or aren’t quite distributed fairly.

I see lessons here for the world. How can we have peace on a wider scale when we can’t find it in ourselves? A lot of the trouble is lack of resources: land, water, goods, respect.

Yet, somehow I have hope. Even without Shalom Bayit, there is still love, still caring, still general fairness. And when the resources are there, when everyone has gotten enough sleep, there are patches of peace.

In the world, there is such a lack of peace. But when individuals from opposite sides sit down and talk and play and work and do: there is respect and appreciation. Even, sometimes, love. Perhaps we can add resources wisely? Perhaps then we can all grow up and stop squabbling.

Sharon Finberg