Nori Odoi wrote about the importance of food earlier in this project. But I want to underscore what it means for a community of Jews. OK, you can cue the jokes here. But seriously. Sandy Kilstein, the Dean of Placement and I once had a conversation about an aging congregation in Massachusetts. That congregation was amazed. They thought they were dying, as many aging congregations think. And they put out forks. And called the food after Saturday morning services a Kiddush Luncheon. Suddenly people stayed. And schmoozed, talked. And stayed longer. And shared their lives. That’s community.
And it is true. In Ron Wolfson’s book about Spiritually Welcoming, he comments on Oneg Shabbat and Kiddush. One of the Synagogue 2000 congregations even does appetizers before and Oneg Shababt after. Maybe this would eliminate the problem that so many congregations have about timing on Friday night. If you give them a little nosh before hand, wine, cheese and crackers, it might just work.
At Congregation Kneseth Israel, I pushed to have more than coffee cake. At first there was resistance. There wasn’t budget. I persisted. We have many people who are gluten free or diabetic and this just wasn’t quite the right food. At most events we now offer veggies and hummus, fruit, and more things clearly labels gluten free. We sometimes schedule a discussion or a class after Kiddush. And the amazing thing is, like the congregation with the forks, people are staying!
This weekend we had a sponsored Oneg Shabbat. These are a little more substantial and really do help the budget. This one was in honor of the new table cloth. This congregation has a tradition of making a table cloth that everyone signs every decade or so. These are complicated labors of love, lovingly embroidered and stitched together by hand. Many times I saw women sitting sewing together. This newest one was started the year we celebrated our 120th anniversary in 2012 and revealed this week. It is gorgeous. And people gathered around to see everyone’s name. It is a real piece of history and the congregation will love using it for decades to come.
At services I spoke about the passage from Numbers that is the third paragraph of the V’ahavata. You shall put fringes on your garments in a certain shade of blue. A blue we no longer use since we don’t really know what “techeleh” is. Although recently there was an archeological find that we now might be able to make new techeleh. Our new table cloth is blue and white. Like a traditional tallit. Like the Israeli flag. And I think it is like the tallit. Those fringes are to remind us of G-d and G-d’s mitzvots, commandments. They beg us to be a good person. When my daughter was young and she would sit in services and yes, was bored, she would braid the strains of my tallit. So when I where one that she has lovingly braided, I remember G-d, the mitzvoth and her. When I sew, and it is not often enough, it slows me down enough to feel the link in the chain of the generations. I remember all the women before me that sewed. My mother, who made every Halloween costume and my confirmation dress. My grandmother who sewed for the Women’s Exchange in Saint Louis. My great grandmother whose quilts I own. I think we will do that with the table clothes as well as we remember the generations that came before.
And then there are the new ovens, one of which arrived Friday afternoon. Those are a symbol of hope and build community too. Since they are part of what enable us to feed community.
And then there is the liquor. The real stuff over which we say Kiddush. That is usually courtesy of the Men’s Club. So they have a place in this too. Not to mention their Scotch and Steak in the Sukkah, ice cream social for Simchat Torah and their latke lunch.
Yes, food and wine, build community.
So come enjoy Apples and Honey this evening after Erev Shabbat Services. Stay and schmooze and tell us about your summers.
So to the women of Sisterhood and especially Wanda and Elise, Barb and Lynn, Robin and Wendy and Wendy and Tina and Liza. And Helen. And to the Men of Men’s Club. Know that you have built community. Thank you.