For thirty days, with another 10 to go, I have been writing, thinking, talking about building community. For much longer than that actually. It is one of our four vision pillars. What is community? Well, like much of Judaism, it is different things to different people. The conversation has been rich and varied.

There were times I threatened to say…I was going to write a Rosh Hashanah sermon but I was out of the office. I was sitting in a coffee shop meeting a new congregant. I was at the Martin Luther King Commission, the U46 Community Alliance Meeting, the CERL meeting. I was studying the Avodah service that we use next week. I was teaching Hebrew School. I was at the hospital visiting an older congregant. I was watering the new landscaping. I waited with the appliance men. I was picking up trash at Lord’s Park as part of Judaism Rocks and Tashlich. I was even bouncing on a bus in Guatemala. And all along the way, I found community. Or maybe communities.

In truth, I belong to lots of communities. We all do. The synagogue. Sisterhood. Men’s Club. That’s part of why we are here tonight. Our kids’ school. Our college alumni association. A Weight Watchers group. An AA group. A choir. A band or orchestra. Team in Training. A sports team. A health club. A book group. A Girl Scout troop. The neighborhood association. The PTO. The founder of Starbucks, Howard Schulz, says that he is not in the coffee business, he is in the community business. Their mission is to inspire and nurture the human spirit—one person, one cup one neighborhood at a time. Celebrating coffee, rich tradition and bringing a feeling of connection.

It is that feeling of connection is what community is all about.

Rabbi David Teutsch, the former president of the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College says that “when communities are functioning well, they take care of their members.”

What people seem to really want is to be in communion with others. To know that they are loved and that others care. So that when there is a tragedy, or a loss, or an illness, friends show up and they know they are not alone. At any given time in our synagogue about 30% of the congregation are going through one of the top five stressors—a medical issue, a job loss, a death of a spouse, parent or child, a divorce, a move. People need the strength of community to navigate these waters and not feel isolated.

People also want community when they have joys to share—a birth of a child or grandchild, a promotion, a wedding, an anniversary or just the little moments day by day by day. I learned an important lesson one year. My soon-to-be-husband and I had just gotten engaged. We yearned to share our excitement. But we weren’t sure. My parents were vocal in their disappointment. He was 20 years my senior. Would we be accepted? Was there a non-judgmental voice in the community? We went to tell our good friends, Alyn and Nancy. Nancy was busy digging in the yard, putting in fall mums. She didn’t miss a beat or get up from her kneepad, when she commanded, “Alyn, go get the champagne.” From that I learned you should always have a bottle of bubbly, alcoholic or non-alcoholic, in your refrigerator, for the big moments and the little ones. That it is important to celebrate with community. And that it is important to create a safe place that is welcoming and accepting.

According to Rabbi David Teutsch, “Underlying the drive for community are several disparate yet complementary desires. Some people are looking for close friends; others hope to find a permanent companion to love and share life with. Some come to community to overcome loneliness; others come for a shared cultural, social or spiritual life; still others are seeking support. Some come knowing that they have much to give.”

“But community transforms everyone, often in unexpected ways. Teachers become students; students turn into teachers. Those poised to give of themselves often find they derive more from community membership than they give. In community we find strength in what we give, receive and share. And in a strong community, we hare a great deal—life rhythms, values and a way of living. That kind of sharing infuses life with meaning and richness not found in any other way.

Meaning—another of our pillars. We will talk more about how meaningful observance and prayer enriches our community tomorrow. But that is another reason we are here tonight. To begin to answer the question, why am I here? That’s the big question. What meaning does my life have? And then why am I specifically here, tonight, sitting in these chairs? How does CKI add meaning to my life? Because if it does not, we should fold up our tents and go home.

Why is this so important—and why is it important here. Because in 2015, we in America live in a fractured society. The bonds of family and community have been shattered. “Autonomy and individual choice—the hallmarks of modern society—have brought unprecedented personal freedom, yet have struck a blow to community building.”

Those results have been feelings of isolation, loneliness, depression. But I hope, I pray, not here. Not at CKI. What people, all people, seem to want—really need—is what the word religion itself promises. From the Latin, religion means to tie back up into. We want to have bonds with other people. We want to have deep roots and tradition.

Community, also from the Latin communitas, is to be in communion with others. That is what we do here.

Community is built on shared experience. We have that when we cheer at a football game, or at Kol Nidre, or when we share a lifecycle event. We do that when we play mini-golf or watch football or make Latkes with the Men’s Club, help with break-the-fast with Sisterhood, read a book with the book group, build a house with Habitat for Humanity. All of those deepen the conversation and the community.

Community is built on Trust and caring, Lawrence Hoffman, a professor of liturgy at Hebrew Union College describes minimum liability and maximum liability institutions. Minimum liability institutions, people join for specific benefits but have no obligations beyond those required to gain the sought after benefits. Country clubs, Boy Scout troops and some congregations, he lists as examples. Israeli kibbutzim were examples of maximum liability communities. Ken Hillman talked about what he learned from his Hebrew School teacher many years ago. If you make enough deposits, you can make a withdrawal. In that case it was about skipping Hebrew School homework. What does that look like here? I hear echoes of Kennedy. Ask not what the shul can do for you, but what you can do for the synagogue.

Community is built on citizenship. Perhaps as Gretchen Vapner suggested, it having friends in the community is not the goal, although that is nice and makes the work more fun. Perhaps it is engaging in working on shared goals. Moving the organization forward. Working towards something together. That’s citizenship. She worries about citizenship frequently, and wonders if anyone cares anymore.

Community is built on shared responsibility.

Visiting the sick isn’t just for rabbis. It is a mitzvah incumbent upon all of us. But too often we are uncomfortable and these things have become professionalized.

But we all have a shared responsibility. It does not fall to me, as the rabbi alone.

These are the obligations without measure, their fruit we eat now, their essence remains for us in the world to come:
To honor father and mother;
To perform acts of love and kindness
To attend the house of study daily
To welcome the stranger
To visit the sick
To rejoice with the bride and groom
To console the bereaved
To pray with sincerity
To make peace where there is strife.

And the study of Torah is equal to them all because it leads to them all. Talmud, Shabbat 127a

We each have our tasks here. Some of us have our unique roles. No one blows shofar better than Ken. That is one of his contributions. No bakes pineapple upside down cake better than Nancy. Each one of us has a special place here and a contribution to make. That is part of how we create community.

Community needs to be built on hope. What does a roasting pan say? It says hope. When Denise Tracy’s family home was flooded out, a woman gave her mother a roasting pan. “You’ll need this for Thanksgiving.” That pan came to represent hope. That there would be a home. That there would be a Thanksgiving. And there was. And every year when she makes the turkey in that very roasting pan that sense of hope is there. And gratitude. What are the concrete signs of hope here at CKI? Yes—this year they are even concrete. I invite you to explore the new entryway, the stairs, the sidewalk, the landscaping, the accessible bathroom, the community garden. And yes, the new oven delivered just this past Friday.

Community is built on mutual respect with a way to handle conflicts. Sometimes, communities don’t always agree. There are sometimes deep divides and fights. Everyone believes they are right. No one wants to cede any territory. We will talk more about this one on the second day of Rosh Hashanah. But for tonight, know that in Judaism, we embrace the diversity of opinion. We certainly do here at CKI. It is based on the Talmud which teaches, “A controversy for the sake of Heaven will have lasting value, but a controversy not for the sake of Heaven will not endure.” Then there are two stories about Hillel and Shammai. Their arguments were for the sake of heaven. The Rebellion of Korach was not. (Mishnah Avot, 5:17). Hillel and SHammai fought a lot. Sometimes about issues of ritual purity. For three years this debate raged on. These said, “The law is according to our position,” and these said, “The law is according to our position.” A divine voice came and said, “These and these are the words of the living God.” BT Eruvin 13b

Community is built on coffee. You laugh. But perhaps my favorite memory of the year might just be a Facebook message I received from Kathleen Kenney-Mau. She is the owner of Blue Box Café. She realized she hadn’t seen me in a while. She knew my name, took the time to find me and said, “I haven’t seen you in a while. Is everything OK? Can I bring you a Magic Bar Latte?” Ok, I was fine and it wasn’t chicken soup but think about what that says about customer service. But it is more than that. It is being warm and welcoming. It is about hospitality. It is about community. And you bet, the very first place when I got back to town was Blue Box. They now have a loyal customer. Because Kathleen took the time to care—and continues to take care of me.

Community needs to be built on vision. Here at CKI we are lucky because we have s vision—Building community, life long learning, meaningful observance and embracing diversity. It all works together to…build community. But Teutsch is right. “That vision should lay the groundwork for a statement of beliefs and values as well as a program of cultural, religious, educational, and social justice programs the community will undertake. People who dream find time and energy they didn’t know they had to make their dreams a reality.” Or as Herzl said it, “If you will it, it is no dream.” Or as Lennon said, and we were reminded of by the first NGO AJWS visited with in Guatemala, Standing in a circle, with our hands clasped, we shouted out, “A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” Turns out it is a Lennon quote. Sounds like a Herzl quote. “If you will it, it is no dream.” Come dream with me.

Community is a way to find meaning. That is why we are here tonight. To pray, to wrestle to find our highest selves, to celebrate with friends, to cry if we need to. That’s what a synagogue provides. It is an intentional, intrinsic relational community. It meets people where they are—in the pews or in a classroom, a hospital room, or a coffee shop.

We at Congregation Kneseth Israel are lucky. We have a community. It is because we are intentional in our community building.