What if the phone rings and it is the Black Baptist pastor asking if the synagogue is safe? If we, the Jewish community is OK? What if the president of the synagogue helps the neighboring black church write a Homeland Security grant and both the church and the synagogue gets them? What if almost every conversation with anybody eventually turns to talk of anti-semitism? 

It is clear that anti-semitism and hate crimes are on the rise. Sadly, in some places tensions have risen between the black communities and the Jewish communities as well. How do you combat a casual comment that people, Jews in particular are picking on Kanye West? What do you do when some African Americans think that Ye was right? What is the big deal with Nick Fuertes and Ye having dinner with Trump? 

What if Elgin has a better way? 

Last night, my husband and I hosted a Chanukah party at our home for leaders in town. Jewish leaders, Black leaders, City leaders. An open house. We had clergy, lay leaders, police officers, elected officials. Mostly we stood around the dining room table, eating latkes with apple sauce or sour cream and mac and cheese. One person having latkes for the first time said, “Oh, so they are like hash browns with apple pie filling.” Right! 

The word Chanukah means dedication. This party was set up to make a visual statement that Elgin is “No place for hate.” We were rededicating ourselves to that vision. 

The conversations were important. Discussions of hunger and homelessness. A newer book, KosherSoul. The political landscape. Policing and racism and the work of the Taskforce on Policing that recently completed their work. The idea that we have deep connections and deep relationships already.  

Many of the people there have been working for years on policing and racism. Some of those conversations through the years have been hard. Some have been poignant. And some have been funny. One year we had a mac and cheese cook off. I lost. Wacky Mac, a prepackaged Kosher mac and cheese like Kraft, just doesn’t cut it. Reggie Kees won.  

Last night I was told to leave mac and cheese to the blacks. Really. One of our Jewish friends walked in and asked where I had found all these beautiful black people. The blacks were not offended, but I was. 

My friend, Tiffany, who is on the Gail Borden Public Library board, kept me relaxed and reminded me that it is all OK. She told me that African Americans are not so easily offended. We danced to “We are family.” I said I’ve never had sisters and always wanted them. She said, “Well, you’ve got them now.” She brought me two mugs that I love. One says Nosh. I had to teach her that word. She taught me years ago now the term boujee. (a hip-hop slang for something “luxurious in lifestyle yet humble in character,” 

 There was a long conversations about favorite rock albums. Lots of Led Zeplin and the Beetles. People who said they were leaving and then stayed and stayed and stayed. It was casual. It was magical. 

We lit the candles and took one, just one photo of the candles and the very diverse group gathered. I talked very briefly about King and Heschel misquoting them both I’m sure. Here are the real quotes. 

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, jr. 

Heschel, who marched with King said that his feet were praying. Last night, we prayed with all our being, just by showing up, just by walking up those three stairs into a house that might be unfamiliar, eating maybe your first latke. 

“There always were two ways to live in a world that is often dark and full of tears. We can curse the darkness or we can light a light, and as the Chassidim say, a little light drives out much darkness. May we all help light up the world.”—Rabbi Jonathan Sacks z”l 

Then we took one group photo. One. Then more people came.  

Later in the evening, I had to tell the story about Susannah Heschel and the orange on the seder plate. Both versions. We talked about Richard Rohr’s Divine Dance and Toba Spitzer’s God is Here. People took turns spinning a dreidle, talking about miracles, working a puzzle. 

As it was reported to me, the mayor of New York at a recent summit about anti-semitism told the clergy gathered to invite other clergy out to dinner. Just groups of 10. To McDonalds, or a restaurant or to a home. Our invitations for this event had gone out prior to the mayor’s summit. We were on to something.  

I know that this is a very busy time of the year. I know that people made time to come last night. I am deeply touched.   

How to combat anti-semitism. Be visible. Loud and proud as the saying goes. Be authentic. Be open. Build lasting deep relationships. Friendships. Share food. Break bread. Maybe we need to rewrite the golden rule: Show up for others as you would have them show up for you! Love your neighbor as yourself. Period.  

Here is what I know. Some day there could be an anti-semetic event in Elgin. There could be a hate crime. It is sadly the world we are living in. There is no doubt that there would be an immediate, serious appropriate response.  

Last night was “just a Chanukah party” and so much more. Maybe, just maybe, because of parties like last night, our corner of the world is just a little safer.  No big statements decrying racism or anti-semitism. Just good food, good conversation and deep, deep appreciation for one another. And lots of hugs. Happy Chanukah. Merry Christmas. Merry Everything.

Thank you, Elgin.